To be able to paint has long been a desire of mine. I am often caught up in life and can’t stop the motion of it all to focus on a new pursuit. However, with our current situation, I am finding the time to take a few painting classes and my life long dream of painting is coming true.
To sit calmly and paint, regardless of how it comes out, is so meditative. I enjoy moving paint around on the canvas and the freedom to not have it be anything but what I want it to be, which sometimes is just a mess of paint. I decided to not be pigeon holed into what I thought my paintings should look like but instead to let it flow and see what happens. One day I was at the end of my class and hating my painting. I decided to just mess around and throw some paint on it and cover up what I had done. I liked the fresh start and the idea that nothing is permanent. Within minutes I felt the empowerment of picking up my brush and starting over. How often in life do we get to do that? Scrap everything and start over with better results. Not an easy thing to do but I learned that day, that at least in painting, it is possible and necessary.
Finding a good painting teacher is like finding a good therapist. If you don’t click and there isn’t a sense of comfort to express yourself then you end up not getting what you want/need out of it. For me the purpose of this pursuit is not only a longing to paint but a therapeutic moment that brings me calmness and reminds me to slow down. It demands my focus and attention and rewards if I do so.
All this to say, I am a believer in art therapy and “art on your own terms.” The later quote was heard in an interview recently, and I can’t seem to shake what that means. Life should be on our own terms, what we choose to pursue, experience and love. So why should art be any different? What this quote means to me is the freedom to create and have it be both mentally and physically rewarding. Ultimately it doesn’t matter what the painting looks like. It’s the experience that is the gift as well as knowing that I was able to make time in my life for a new pursuit that will now become a part of my life.